The only thing Lance is Dedicated to are the findings of the Warren Commission Sham which he defends like the good, little Zealot he is.
Etc., etc., etc.
We here at the Arizona Institute for Weirdness Studies are unworthy of so much attention from someone of Dan's stature and are nonplussed and dismayed at the extent to which our little contributions seem to have brought pain to his fragile psyche in this instance. Since our very mission is to spread weirdness-oriented joy and light in our wake, our own fragile psyches are pained by Dan’s apparent lack of joy and light. The good news is, help is available. Trained AIWS counselors who promise not to giggle at you are standing by at 1-800-IMA-WACKO.
The source of Dan’s pain is not clear to us, and we have pondered his words deeply. A few weeks ago, he was promoting a conspiracy in which Bill Shelley had recruited a sixth-floor hitman at the behest of Jack Cason and had personally held Oswald in a headlock in a first floor anteroom during the shooting, playfully administering noogies to Oswald’s noggin. Here, he argued that the witnesses establish a strong circumstantial case that Oswald was not the sixth-floor gunman, which dovetails nicely with his noogies-noggin theory. He further accused our beloved founder, a Serious and Dedicated Researcher, of not dealing in substance in his responses.
Deeply pained, our beloved founder undertook a diligent review of all the said witnesses and established that only 18-year-old whiz kid Arnold Rowland said anything seriously inconsistent with Oswald being the sixth-floor shooter. Rowland, moreover, was talking about a man with a rifle at the opposite end of the sixth floor and, moreover moreover, his first several accounts said nothing about an overshirt and were not at all inconsistent with the man, if there was one at all, being Oswald.
Our beloved founder thought his most recent contribution was rather substantive on his part and demonstrated that Dan’s strong circumstantial case had pretty much gone poof. In any event, if Dan insists his strong circumstantial case has in fact not gone poof and that our beloved founder is just a Lone Nut zealot meanie, we shall humbly accept this verdict rather than push the matter and risk the infliction of more psychic pain. Indeed, several of our board members fear that Dan seems to be morphing into Martin Weidmann before their very eyes, but perhaps this is just their overactive imaginations and we have admonished them not to start seeing sock puppets under every rock.
Wishing you all, and especially Dan, peace, joy, love, etc., etc., we remain
The Arizona Institute for Weirdness Studies